Leaving behind the past...

I placed a box in front of Dean. He glanced up with a puzzled look.  I signalled for him to open it. As he lifted the top of the cream box his eyes lit up. A black top with the the words worlds best dad written on it laid neatly inside. A tear slipped down his cheek as he jumped up and embraced me. Dean always wanted children. We had talked about it endlessly over the years. I always knew he would be a great father. A small bark startled me. When Bella died I was devastated. So once I had fully healed Dean surprised me with a black Labrador puppy. His name Bailey. His paws pounded into the room. I rubbed behind his ears.

Later that day I went to mum's grave and laid down her favourite white roses like I did every mothers day. I glanced around at all the other people kneeling at graves, mourning their loved one's. A little girl and her father placed a bunch of tulips and a teddy on a grave. The girl snuggled into her dads arms. She couldn't be older than 5. I could hear her sobs. I was lucky that had more time with mum than some people would ever get. I looked back at the grave stone with her  name engraved onto it. I muttered under my breath "Mum. I wish one day that my children love me as much as I loved you." The tears started streaming down my cheeks. Once they had stopped I sung mum's favourite song. Then I stood up and whispered "This is what leaving behind the past feels like."...